One with All

Sometimes the feeling of isolation was overwhelming to Sunny. At the tender age of 11, she thought that it was fundamental human nature to feel on one’s own. Sunny often wondered if she was the only one who felt this loneliness. How come there were so many people on this planet, yet everyone was an isolated individual? To Sunny, that did not make any sense. In the end, they were all the same - made of the same substance, the same spirit. Why did they all have to focus on their differences rather than than the same core that they all shared?

‘Mum, why am I who I am?’ Sunny asked her mother one day when she was sitting in the kitchen eating a snack after a school day.

Sunny’s mum looked at her. ‘What do you mean by asking me that question? We just are who we are.’

‘But why is it me inside this body? Why was I born I? Why wasn’t I you, or someone else?’ Sunny blinked and took another sip of her hot chocolate.

‘We are born to this planet and given air to breath. We get cells from both of our parents and God makes us a person. There is no particular reason for why we are who we are. It is all down to biology and God in the end.’ Sunny’s mum gave a dismissive wave with her hand. ‘Now, please finish your snack so that you can go and do your homework.’

‘But mum, why do I feel so on my own? Why am I on my own? Why are we all on our own when we are all here together?’ Sunny looked at her mum with big, bright eyes that radiated innocence.

Sunny’s curiosity was not satisfied by her mother’s answer. Her mind kept wondering around such questions. Many times she felt that people around her wanted to become close to her and wanted to feel a connection with her, but something prevented them from showing this. It felt that people were scared of opening themselves up to her and feeling close to her.

It seemed that people were afraid of their own humanity. Why did her own grandmother need to feel strange about telling Sunny about how she was scared of spending her last days on this earth on her own? Why did her best friend need to lie to her and tell her that she for an A in a exam when she actually got a C? Why did her brother need to tease her about the spots on her face instead of telling her that her smile was pretty? Sunny felt that she was constantly being pushed away by those who were meant to be closest to her.

When Sunny turned fifteen, she learnt about an opportunity to go to India on a school exchange trip. The pupils from Europe would stay at a monastery and be taught by local monks. They would learn about the local culture and soak in a different way of living. Sunny jumped at the opportunity. She had watched some films from India and adored the colourful clothes and the cheerful music that dominated the films. Everyone seemed so happy in those clips. Everyone seemed to enjoy their lives and to share it with others. That is what stroke Sunny the most - the shared nature of the experience, which was completely different to what she was used to in her immediate surroundings. Sunny thought that she could learn something important in India and that could help her live her life in Europe. That could help her with sharing her life in Europe with those that she wanted to share it with.

The whole Spring, she worked very hard at school in order to do well and to be accepted on the programme. Her best friend Mary was puzzled by her enthusiasm to go to India.

‘Why do you want to go there so badly?’ Mary would ask Sunny when they walked home from school. ‘Aren’t you scared of the illnesses that you can catch there? My dad told me that you can get very sick in India.’

Sunny thought about that for a moment. ‘But you can get sick anywhere. You can get sick here. Jessie was in hospital, because he had a very bad pout of shingles. And we still live here. And billions of people live in India all the time. If it really was that bad, wouldn’t they all be dead by now?’

Mary just shook her head and gave Sunny a look that indicated that Sunny was losing it.

Sunny’s hard work was rewarded and she did very well in her exams. Soon enough she was on the plane to India with a bunch of her classmates and an anxious teacher. Sunny watched the clouds with an orange hew from the window as the plane descended. From the plane’s landing, it was a whirlwind trip to the monastery. On the way, Sunny spotted dozens on cows mingling amongst the crazy traffic, women wearing headscarves and looking scared, dirty children crossing the roads, rikshaw bikes carrying tourists. Sunny sat quietly on the bus, mesmerised by the sights and sounds of this new land.

‘Look, there is a motorbike with an entire family on it!’ Simon, one of Sunny’s school mates, shrieked. All of the pupils turned to stare at the bike.

‘How can they do that? Don’t they think that they can fall down?’ Annie, the girl sitting next to Sunny yelled.

‘That is probably all they have to ride with’, Sunny whispered. ‘They probably don’t have money to get a car.’

The teacher in front of the bus stood up. ‘Now, ladies and gentlemen, we will see many things here that we don’t see in Europe. We need to remain polite, accept the differences and not make the locals here feel like we are judging them.’ The teacher looked at all the children firmly when a cow stopped by their bus and pushed its tung out to lick the door window. All the children giggled.

The monastery was an oasis to Sunny. The monks were so calm and nice to everyone. They were always smiling and made each one of the newcomers welcome in their home. The monastery was filled with flowers and cloths in orange and red colours. One of the monks explained to Sunny that these colours signified wisdom and luck.

‘We should surround ourselves with the colours that bring us goodness, the people who are calm and cheerful, and then we will feel the same as they are feeling’, the monk explained and smiled. ‘We are all the same in the end. We can all connect with one another through simples gestures. A warm smile can really bring two people together and make them feel like they share something. We should make others feel that we are here for them and that we are dealing with the same dilemmas as them on a daily basis.’

Sunny nodded. Finally she was hearing words that made sense to her.

‘In Europe, we often feel so isolated and lonely’, she told the monk hesitantly. ‘Here, in this monastery, I feel so connected to everyone. It feels that we are all a community, an entity living together. I feel that I belong to this group of people. I can tell that my classmates are much happier here too. I have never before spent this much quality time with them. In Europe, somehow we don’t manage to create this kind of an environment where we would all feel the connection to one another.’

The monk smiled a bright, big smile. ‘I know. That is the disease of the West. We are all the same, yet in the West, people focus on their individuality rather than their shared characteristics. Westerners have a lot to learn from us. We are much more connected to one another and tapped into out innate nature. People in the West seem to have become too distracted and lost touch with their true selves. It is all there, in all of us. We just all need to unravel what we have learnt during our upbringing and to start being one with all.’

That was the turning point for Sunny. She knew that from then on, she would do her best to share her true self with others, to be there for others and always try to make those around her feel that they were all the same and there for one another.

And so she did. Once Sunny returned home from India, she felt like a changed girl. She felt that India had allowed her to be herself, to become herself again. She no longer worried about what others would think of her, as she knew that every one else had the same wasteful worry. She no longer felt that she needed to please anyone, as she knew that everyone shared the same feeling. She felt that she was fine as she was and that everyone else was fine as they were.

It felt as if everyone was able to absorb this positive message from Sunny. Sunny’s mum told her that she was beautiful, Mary wanted to spend time with her every day after school, Sunny’s brother lent her his skate board for an entire afternoon.

Sunny’s dad even told her that they were all very proud of her. ‘Sunny, we are so proud of all your achievements and what you have done in a short life. Your trip to India was a success and we hope you continue on the right path as long as you live.’ Then, to Suny’s biggest surprise, her dad hugged her. This was the biggest and warmest hug that Sunny had received in her whole life and it confirmed to her the wise monk’s words on how what you put out into the universe will echo back to you.